airbageuphoria

Foderal Court
Laredo, Texas

The Court: You may close for the government, Mr. Blask

Mr Blask: "...When we live here in this United States, every law that is w3ritten on the books applies equally to us and we must live by them. And the reason that is the case is important and msut be taken so importantly is because you are dealing with a man who has taken this stand during the time that he testified and told you, 'My name is Dr. Timothy Leary and that I am a psychologist, that I know it is wrong to possess maijuana, but I know there are certain ways that I can possess it legally and I know that if I had applied for such relief that I probalby would not have been granted it because they would have conducted investigations up in Millbrook.'

And he tells you that despite all these things, 'I am more than the law: I am Dr. Timothy Leary and the law does not apply to me'

And that is why this case is so important, because he is not above the law. None of us are.

Cognress enacted these laws in this book and they enacted the laws concerning marijuana because they felt that it was an immense danger and that is why it was there.

"....He has admitted to you that he smokes marijuana. He told you taht in 1964 or 1965, the firs titme he ever touched marijuana was in India. This is research? This is a man who tells you that 'I am above the law'. What kind of man are you dealing with? What kind of man do you ahve before you today?

You have a man that says, 'I believe in bringin up my children the old-fashioned way.' and the 'old-fashioned way', ladies and gentlemen, is to expose them to marijuana, expose them to these other drugs that he has no right to dispense. And that is what we have here.

Is that irresponsibility? I can think of no- no other situation that can be more irresponsible."

Mr. Fitzgibbon: "if Your Honor please. I thought on the questio of religion we weren't going to talk on it."

The Court: "Religion?"

Mr. Fitzgibbon: "The right to bring up our children."

Mr. Blask: "He did not have the proper order forms. There is no question about that. But he won't get a license because he knows they won't give it to him and he secretes the marijuana. That is the responsible person for you"...

The Court: "Is there anything you want to tell me at this time in your own behalf or in mitigation or extenuation?"

Defendant Leary: "No, sir."

The Court: "In that case under count wo I impose a period of confindement of twenty years and a fine of $20,000. On count three I impose a period of confinement of ten years and a fine of $20,000."
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Mr. Blask believes that the laws written in those books are the final authority in what is wrong and what is right. Are we allowed to impose ourselves on each other, even if not all people involved agree with those laws? Are the laws we have written in books completely and unmistakenly the final word on moral righteousness? Would a complete absense of laws make more sense? Is that even possible? All views and experiences that have been imposed on us will always cloud our judgement. Because we have been raised that way, we will always see stealing as evil, we will see lying as evil, we will see the world in terms of good and evil always, unless we make the valiant effort to distance ourselves from this mindset. Can we distance ourselves from this mindset which makes us so human? Or is there some other way of looking at the world that would make us more human?
Maybe some things we experience now, like love and joy and sadness are inherently human, but arent those reactions programmed to be triggered when some action demands them to be triggered? This is a reaction programmed in us by the norm, by society. So, what IS human? Have we already found it, and should stop thinking about why our current state of life needs to be justified? Should we just swallow the pill blindly and have faith? Maybe there is a danger in thinking for yourself.

i love, i become angry, i think, i feel, i am..am i?

"This is not a war on drugs, this is a war on personal treatment" - Bill Hicks

so...here we go.

I've been reading a book called High Priest by Timothy Leary. At first I was pretty skeptical that the book could actually hold any gravity and that I would be interested at all. On a very very basic level, the book is just about drugs. After reading the first quarter of it, it's turning into much more than that.

The book starts with Leary waking up in a room after a drug trip and realizing that up until that point in his life he has been nobody. He would always wake up and drive a car to the same job and come home to the same routine every day of his life. Using a hallucinogen apparently shattered the serenity of his little system and when he woke up he felt like an annonymous, nonexistant, not important.

I'm not trying to write a book report here, even though it's starting to look like one. From the first page of the book, this guy completely hit on some of the very thoughts and feelings I've had for a while now. Don't you ever feel enslaved and limited? You dont know, but you feel in your every single damn drop in your veins that there is SOMETHING more out there. There has to be more than waking up and going to school, or working, or "chilling at a kickback". You just can't put your finger on it, but it's always tickling at you, always itching, and you can't scratch. It kind of makes you want to shout as loud as you possibly can and hope that by doing so you'll shatter the illusion of whatever it is that makes you feel trapped.

Leary proposed early in the book that using drugs can expand your consciousness, revealing either more about the universe or about yourself.

"The TURN ON bolt shatters structure. Reveals the frozen nature of the artifical stage-set men call reality. Certitude collapses....TUNE IN means that you sit in the debris of your shattered illusions, and discover that there is nothing, you are nothing except the ebareer of the wirecoil of life, that your body is the temple of the Light and you begin once again to build a structure to preserve and glorify the Light....DROP OUT means detach yourself tenderly, aesthetically, harmoniously from the fake-prop studio of the empire game and do nothing but guard and glorify the Light..." right then im thinking 'holy shit'. he got this from taking drugs.

He gets into a discussion about how psychologists have two little factions going on. On the one side you have psychologists that have tried hallucinogenic drugs and have applied what they have learned to their psychoanalytical thoughts. On the other side you have psychologists that have not tried drugs because they believe it would compromise one's system of beliefs and any observations or opinions formed would be biased. Leary points out that he thinks both groups of psychologists are disqualified from having any serious opinion on the matter...the drug takers for taking drugs, which would definitely make them biased...and the ones that dont take drugs because they have not experienced it.....

Learning about either yourself or the universe more intimately would definitely change the way you see the world, right? Hallucinations through drugs could be one way our brains tune into the underlying currents and connections that the universe shares with man. It could reveal the answers to every single one of our questions. The hallucinations could also be nothing more than our thought process and conscious mind completely tripping the fuck out, abd it would be like reading way too much into it when there's nothing there. (that reminds me of sitting in my english classes and analyzing literature, with the teacher making extremely farfetched suggestions about the meaning hidden metaphors and bullshit like that)

so i kept reading and i came to a part of the book that really struck home with me.
"the terrible truth began to dawn-and, no, i didn't want to face it- that our consciousness creates the universe we experience. WE are the architects of the celestial and hellish stages we act upon.....psychedelic drugs didnt solve any problems. they just magnified, mythefied, clarified to jewel-like sharpness the basic problem of life and evolution....the old games will always be with us: spontaneity vs. control, freedom vs. structure, love vs. isolation. the stage sets get bigger. the energies move faster, our insight into the divine plan becomes more awefully detailed. the razor-edge of paradox remains"

holy shit.

nobody really thinks of things that way, but i agree with him entirely there. the universe exists ONLY as we see it. there is no way to alter the inherent, fundamentel way your brain operates. you see colors the way you do, you hear things the way you do, you process information the way you do, and there's no way to change that. drugs dont change the way you process information, they dont add another brain to your body, they dont add 3 more eyes to your head, they dont give you a new organ that can detect waves of invisible particles as they pass by you in the air, they dont do anything but magnify what senses you already have. the only way the universe will ever exist is the way humans perceive its existance, that's it. because of that, we can believe whatever the fuck we want, we can propose a hypothesis or whatever else, and it may or may not be true, but is any of that knowledge relevant to the "actual truth", if there is such a thing? or does the "actual truth" even matter? because we'll never see things any differently, maybe our proven experiments and laws are the absolute truth, regardless of whatever else there might be out there, or in us. or maybe there is a way to change the way we function as humans, the way our brain operates?

we still think of the world as good vs. evil, and all the other things he said, we always juxtapose two things, always compare everything. we live by a fucking norm, set by the majority of people that are virtually unaware of their existance, not that im any better with it. everything we say or do is based on what's "right". who the fuck is qualified to tell us what IS right and what isnt? at this point you've got hardcore orthodox religious people telling me that 'He can tell us what's right', 'He can lead us to the divine truth', 'He holds all the answers'. well, fuck you. certain religions, for the majority of people i've ever met, are just a bunch of fucking makeshift lies to keep everyone on the ground. that way people dont need to think and figure things out for themselves. tell me something, if the entire world believed that killing one large animal or human every single day for the rest of your life was essential to living a healthy life, wouldnt the guy that isnt killing anything get shit for that? he isnt doing what's accepted as good and normal. again, who the hell is qualified to decide what's right? shouldnt everyone have the freedom to live their lives the way they want? (does that include living with a set normal way of life?) this is the point where people are thrown into asylums for psychiatric help, or jails, or executed for whatever reason.

although Leary admits that drugs may not do anything but magnifiy your senses, they can still open your eyes and your mind, but some people may not need drugs for that.

im only done with the first quarter of the book.

i dont know what's right, i dont know what to think, i dont know why we're here or why we exist, if we actually do exist, the way we do. im still looking for the answers, i may never find any of them, but at least i know that the questions exist...i think.

"In a time of darkness it is essential to be cautious and reserved. One should not needlessly awaken overwhelming enmity by inconsiderate behavior. In such times one ought not to fall in with the practices of others; neither should one drag them censoriously into the light. In social intercourse one should not try to be all-knowing. One should let many things pass, without being duped."-I Ching

testing

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